Saturday, March 5, 2011

A Month. Really?

It has been over a month since I've said anything on here. How sad. Well, a lot has happened since early February: Valentine's Day, some great workouts, some fights, some really goooood times, signed a lease, and had another freaking muscle spasm.

Well let's see...
I'm still on top of my Bible readings, well except for yesterday. But I'm just about caught up and will catch up with no problem. Since February I have finished Leviticus! and I may have even still be in Exodus, but I finished that too! I can't really say I've understood everything or been 100% focussed like I should be, but it has still helped and been great to read. I've only missed one church service this year I think. I'm going to feel bad whenever I go back to Starkville 1st Baptist, though because they notice when I come, so they have probably noticed I haven't been there in a while. I've come home to church twice now, I went to 1st Presbyterian with some of the guys on my team, I missed the one service and I tried out the church Cross Point. Neither of the churches I went to really moved me the way Central church does here at home. I'm excited to go there in the morning. My relationship with God is getting stronger every day. I always tell myself I'm going to be one of those people that prays before every meal, but for some reason, when I actually sit down, I forget. How does this happen? I don't know. I walk in the cafeteria saying "Alright, remember to pray when you sit down" and then when I actually do, I just start talking to people and eating. Is this a bad thing? It obviously indicates that I become too focussed on food and talking to people than God, I think. It's just weird, but I pray a lot now-a-days. I also have been watching the church that my sister goes to in Knoxville! I REALLY like listening to the guy that gives sermons to the university students. He's really good about relating scripture to life and suggesting how to apply it.

I feel like I wrote enough in that paragraph to make this a post, but there's still a lot more for me to talk about, confront, or whatever I'm using this thing for. Maybe just one more topic for tonight.

My girlfriend. Not even sure where to start with this one lately. I feel like we have so many ups and downs. One minute we're fighting, the next we're laughing. One minute I feel old and married, the next I feel the "young and in love" way most people do our age. I mean, all in all it's great and I wouldn't trade it for the world. She's doing a pretty decent job battling her ED lately. There are some aspects I feel that could be a lot better, but I can't imagine going through it and am in no place to judge or make assumptions or tell her what she should do. Sometimes I just want to scream STOP COUNTING. JUST EAT IT. or something along those lines. I kind of did last night actually. Probably not one of my finest moments, but she recognized the problem and confronted it so I was proud of her. It's just weird how hypocritical situations with her and food can be.. like last night she's explaining how healthy the french toast we just made was, but then she was sooo scared to eat it at first. That's one thing I don't understand. I just wanna say listen to yourself haha. Also, she's very smart and clearly knows her problems. She's told me them 32789 times and how to fix them, but for some reason actually doing it is another story. Well, that's the case with a lot of things. "Easier said than done." I feel like this paragraph has been really depressing or I've sounded harsh, but really I'm so proud of her because I know it takes some strength that I don't even know if I have to fight something like that. I KNOW she'll get there one day. Also, she's a freaking beast at running. I'm jealous. 7th at SEC Indoor Championships in the 5k! If she wasn't sick, I think she could have gotten around 5th, but 7th is so great! I feel honored to be dating such a stud runner. haha

Well, it's late. I'm tired. This is long enough. I'll update soon on running/school/other less important matters hahah

1 comment:

  1. Hey Conrad(: You don't know me, but I read your girlfriend's blog. I know that it must be really frustrating to see Haley struggle through her disorder. I am in recovery myself, so I understand what she is going through, and that it isn't always easy for disordered people to listen to their own advice or face their fears.
    To a normal person, it may just be food, but to someone in recovery, every meal can seem like a mountain we have to climb! So although it may be hard, try to be patient with your girlfriend. She's trying really hard to beat ED and you should be proud of her.
    Anyways, keep up the blogging, you're doing great(:

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