It's been way too long since I've posted on here. I don't have any readers though. I'm starting to wonder why I even have this thing. I'm not inspiring to people like my girlfriend. If I were just a random person coming across my blog, I certainly wouldn't follow it haha. Oh well, I guess I have a lot to update on!
1. This new year is going to be one to remember for sure! I am submersing my self with the Lord! I'm going to try to read The Bible in a year! This is definitely one of the most positive things I have going for me right now! I haven't been able to rely on much lately and the Lord is all I need anyways. I need to seriously work on my relationship with him before I can do any good in others' lives or even my own. I need to rearrange my priorities. I say this knowing that I live in sin. I hate that I live a sinful life, but who doesn't sin. Some things I've been reading the past couple days have said how the Lord will love us no matter what and he will never leave us. Even when we push him away. I don't want to push him away, ever again. I've also read about how the satan walks around just looking for someone to taunt and that I need to have the courage and faith to deny him when I am tempted. I've learned that I am not smart enough to make my own decisions or choose my path and that the Lord has already chosen it. This leads me to thinking about how decisions I make will change my life. Well, if I make them, I assume God knows I was going to make them and they will eventually teach me some lesson. I guess I will just have to face the consequences for my actions like my mother always tells me. If I choose to lie, cheat, or curse, I will be answering for it one day. If I choose to drink, I could be caught and punished. If I choose to have sex, I could wind up with a baby. Some of these consequences for sins are definitely more frightening than others, but these are choices I will face and choices I will answer for one day and learn things from. I know that the Lord will never leave me through the decisions I make, but that certainly doesn't mean I should just flat out sin and be ok with it, right? I'll fight these battles within as they come. For now, all I want is for this hunger for more knowledge from God to continue.
2. My family is doing great, I guess. I should most certainly work on my relationships with them. I didn't even call my mother today. She's probably so sad. She's trying to eat healthy and exercise this year and lose some weight. I'm so proud of her and I will be praying every day that she continues it. My sister was accepted into her Graduate School of choice which is really exciting! It's so weird to see my sister in the real world. haha
3. My girlfriend... where do I even begin with her.. I haven't even talked much about her on here as a friend pointed out. Some boyfriend I am? Well, she's amazing, but definitely going through a hard time. Actually, I think every day is hard, probably even every hour. I can't imagine fighting an ED like she is. I HATE when it takes over her. It's like within one hour of her restricting her diet, I can tell this other "Haley" comes out and is totally not the girl I fell in love with. Sometimes this scares me for our future. We were talking about our future the other night. It's so weird to think I already have my life all planned out. Don't get me wrong, everything is pretty much exactly how I want it.. as good as it can be. It's just scary. Other guys I know don't even know what they want to be after college. They are focussed on the day ahead of them. I'm always thinking about the future. I've always been a little more mature in this sense than most other people my age though. (that sounded kinda prideful, something I just read tells me it is NOT a good thing). Anyways, I have a lot of respect for my girlfriend for everything she's been through. I'll love her no matter what. I can already hear those wedding vowels, and I certainly will love her in sickness or in health, for richer or for poorer.. and whatever the other traditional vowels are too haha I pretty much have already loved her through all these things.. So there is not a doubt in my mind that I would stand by her side through anything else.
4. School... is back in session. I love school. It's so weird. College is awesome though. I'm taking 20 hours this semester. Kinda a lot for someone like me. I'm definitely going to stay busy, unlike last semester. I am totally ok with this. I want to graduate in 3 years and if this is what it takes them I'm on board for the ride. I just really don't want to lose my 4.0.
5. Running. I don't even know where to begin. I LOVE IT. I'm practically obsessed. I want to be so great, but I suck right now. Getting back in shape after not running for almost a month and then only being able to do very little is not easy. I have my first workout with the team tomorrow morning. I'm kinda freaking out about it. I feel embarrassed. I'm nervous that my leg will start hurting half way through and I will be worse off than when I started. I want to feel stronger before I take something like this on. Today's run was amazing. I was a little winded afterwards, but it was a pretty good pace and the longest I've run in a while. I didn't have any pain either. Such a great day for me in the running world. I only hope that tomorrow goes just as well! This is the part of my life that I have definitely turned over to God. He has a plan for me with running. He had me injured over Christmas for a reason. It was probably because I was becoming so obsessed that I needed to stop. I just hate that it took me so long to realize this. Even with this minor leg pain, if it's hurting, it's hurting for a reason. Whatever it is, I don't know, but I honestly will not worry over it any more. I believe greatness is in my future thanks to Him and if it includes running then so be it! If not, then tough luck, it'll be something else!
I guess I should go get some rest for this workout in the morning though! I think this post was long enough anyway!